Monday, September 10, 2012
The Happiest 35th of All
Rewind........go back 5 years......you there yet? I had just turned 30 & was newly diagnosed. I was told several times throughout that year that a 5 year life expectancy wasn't on my side. I remember on numerous occasions telling myself, "You will get there!". I remember praying & asking God to just given me 5 more years...because I was gonna make a difference. I know I could! That's all I wanted 5 more years. Now forward to today....."I made it!" What an amazing 5 years it has been. I have been on a journey like no other! A journey that has pushed me to LIVE, FIGHT, LOVE & EXPLORE. I have made a difference more than I could have ever imagined and to know that fills me with so much emotion. Personally....I've discovered so much about myself. I'm stronger than I ever gave myself credit for. I think that comes from being a mother who feels a huge responsibility to show my children that no matter what cards you are handed you can make a difference. I have a life that fulfills me in so many ways and I am so very thankful for that. I have learned that it is impossible to live without failing in life. But, failing isn't too bad when you tried or you learned. I use to live so cautiously. Failure wasn't an option. Sometimes that 20 seconds of insane courage & uncomfortable bravery that a person needs to have has lead to some of my greatest experiences. God gave me these 5 years & I thank him everyday for them! I am a different person, I am a fighter. I'm most proud of the fact that I have fought for my son & maybe even my daughter or their children one day! I love the fact that I have made the impossible....well possible! There have been many days where I start to tell myself I can't. But, I soon realize that in order to make a change it has to come within. A person is most powerful when they believe in themselves. Sometimes a plan or goal doesn't come out exactly the way I want it too. But, then I realize that it was JUST a goal and my journey to that goal was the most important part. I've realized that rarely do I end up exactly where I wanted to be, but in so many ways I ended up where I needed to be. I just always have faith that the way it turns out is the way it is suppose to be:) Plus, a person can't really appreciate life to the fullest unless it's knocked you down a few times....right?:) As far as my health goes....I can say that my heart is in fantastic shape...well for me:) My issues from my stroke are microscopic & I have adjusted to the new me. I take all my issues not as a reminder of weakness but a reminder of strength. A reminder that humbles me to keep that fighting spirit. I've been trying to live my life realizing the God gave me two hands for a reason....one to help myself and the second to help those around me. In these five years having a focus & a passion to help others is what has pushed me to get where I am today. Not to mention the many great doctors, friends & family I have:) So, today I want to thank you all as always for never laughing at me because I'm insanely mushy, for always supporting me & for always encouraging me! My life is only amazing because of you all! Today I will not whine because I have hit middle age....but I will celebrate this amazing gift I have been given! Thank you God for my 5 years...I promise if I'm blessed with more years to come....I'll make you even prouder & I will NEVER stop fighting:) P.S. My strong heart allowed me to run today!! A very appreciated gift!